Blessing Amos is a passionate Parenting Expert, inspired by her upbringing in a military barracks and her experience in children’s ministry, she dedicates herself to guiding parents in raising morally and spiritually upright children. As a content creator and motivational speaker, she shares her insights through social media platforms like “Raising Godly Children” and “Moments with AuntyB,” aiming to foster a better society through effective parenting. Blessed with a supportive family, Blessing combines her personal experiences and professional expertise to advocate for nurturing the next generation. In this interview, she shares her journey and vision.
I am a product of God’s grace. I grew in the military barracks which we all know houses different kind of people (the good and the bad). In such setting, i grew up seeing my parent forming a formidable team in training us to be morally upright but also spiritually upright and steadfast. That helped me and my siblings to remain focused. Also, I went through the children Sunday school where I was taught spiritual values. I felt in love with the Children Sunday school set up that after graduating, I continued as a children teacher in the church, went though series of coaching and training in Children ministry. For me, that I grew in the barracks environment where I saw my peers derailed but God helped me, coupled with the impactful parenting I went through vis-a-vis, the children ministry experience, were key in developing my passion for children and parenting. over the years I have seen parenting one right and parenting gone wrong. God has blessed me with a supportive husband and three (3) wonderful kids (2 boys and a girl); I found myself engaging parents at various quarters on issues of parenting for if we get it right in guiding our children in their early formative years, we will reduce social vices in the society, and it will become a better place for all of us. This passion metamorphoses me into a teacher, a motivational speaker and an advocate for Raising Godly Children.
To sum it up, I will say that I became a Parenting Expert out of the burning desire of wanting every parent to get it right having worked among children. I am a content creator and by the grace of God, I have created various social media community pages namely, Raising Godly Children and “Moments with AuntyB” where I talk about Parenting.
Speaking on effective strategies for managing children’s behavior she explains that,
Every child is unique and should be handle a such. Most parents make the mistake of generalising required behavior and expectations for all children. recognise that children are gift from God, so we must appreciate them a such, Secondly, they are reward. Depending on the efforts we put into training and tutoring our children, they turn out to be either a good reward or bad ones in the future. So the key principle and strategy for managing children are – Treat every child on his/her uniqueness avoid comparing children; Be a role model, for we are the first learning institution and materials in their lives; lead by example being conscious of the fact that our children watch us and will generally as a rule of thumb, want to emulate what they see us do; be available in their lives by being their friend and creating an environment where they will be free to talk to us about everything and share their curiosities; Set clear and realistic expectations; Encourage good positive behaviors; appropriate consequences for wrong actions and at the same time commend good behavior; Communicate regularly with your kids, seek to understanding them and elicit feedback, do not assume. If parents can adopt these strategies, by the grace of God, it will help in managing their children’s behavior.
Balancing discipline and nurturing to foster a healthy environment
Like I said earlier, we must be friends to our children and be available. For me, a healthy environment is that which the atmosphere created by husband and wife is full of love and peaceful. Such environment is transitive and welcoming. In such kind of environment, anything nurtured will produce healthy outcome. Nurturing in this context, is that deliberate effort to care fore, protect and tend to maturity our children so that we may shape them into becoming useful to themselves and the society. Discipline on the other hand, is simply impartation of knowledge and skill in order to shape into expected outcome. Children are product of love and needed to be appreciated and shown love, and at the same time taught how to love. However, we need to set boundaries and be deliberate. As parents, we must be careful not to spoil our children in the name of loving them. It is not everything the child wants that we give him/her. One key way to balance it is to teach the child contentment.
To sum it up, disciplining a child is both deterrent for wrong behavior and commendation for good behavior so as to ingrain in the child acceptable behavior, being consistent in this is also key. Giving the child everything in actual sense is not show of love to the child. Let us discipline them to appreciate humanity, be supportive and sacrificial towards their peers, they influence their environment positively and the environment becomes healthy for all. So as parents, we need to create a healthy, loving and conducive environment for our children noting that the right environment bring the best out of our children.
Parents must be firm and decisive in their decisions and operate as a team. Let us teach our children contentment and how to live to better humanity. Striking a balance in nurturing and discipline with the use of the right methodology is crucial.
We achieve this by establishing clear expectations, providing consistent guidance, and approaching discipline with empathy and understanding, by so doing parents will create a supportive environment where the child feels safe, secure, and empowered to succeed.
Speaking on how strategies need to evolve as children grow from infants to teenagers, she explains that One thing that is constant in life is change. Everything in life has phases and each phase has its peculiar characteristics. So also the child’s develops in phases. As parents, having this understanding is key to assist us appreciate the development of our children through phases.
It is worth noting that every phase requires different approach and strategy in parenting. parents need to understand that as the child evolves through these stages, we need to change formulas and approaches we apply in parenting. From passing instructions to guiding on the right part, to tutorship, to coaching and mentorship, to counseling and them discussing to understand their viewpoint and shaping same in the right way. This approach is to ensure they get the right strategy to stand for themselves outside there.
The journey of parenting is an ever-evolving adventure. The strategy a Parent uses for a toddle can not be applied to a teenager because it will be counter productive. Psychologists opined that, for each developmental stage of a child, you need to adopt a different strategy. More challenging is the tidal wave of the impact of technology to every sphere of endeavor, parents must not shy away from appreciating this and skill up to be able to communicate in the language and world of this generation and guide our children to be deliberate in that space.
As our children grow and embark on their school journey, our parenting role subtly shifts. This transition is one of the most profound changes in the parenting journey. We shift from safeguarding their every physical move to nurturing their emotional and educational development
How parents can support their children’s academic success and love for learning
As stated earlier, we the first institution our children study to emulate. First and foremost, we most appear to our children to be parents who loves learning and encourage same. It is sacrosanct to develop interest in what happens in the academic world of our children. We can discuss what happens in the school environment, be available to support in their academic works. Parents must create time for their children and not leave them to the mercy of their teachers and home tutors alone, it is teamwork. After all God gave them to us as a trust. Statistics have shown that when parents and families are involved in their children’s academics, the children do better and are always in high spirit in their feelings about going to school. In fact, many studies show that what the family does is more important to a child’s school success than how much money the family makes or how much education the parents have.
Another way to show support is by trying to motivate them buying gifts when they do well and reassuring them when don’t do well. Let us not put undue expectations on our children and creating a competitive spirit as must parents do. Avoid speaking comparative demeaning statements to your children for it discourages and put them under unnecessary pressure. Some children usually start slow but later pick up. Let us remember, every child is unique .